Tag Archive: perfectionist

Oct 13

Embracing Who We Are

This is a crazy metaphor…maybe only women will understand it…but I’ve been thinking a lot lately about embracing who we ARE and not striving for something different.
This came about as I started letting my hair, do what it does…which is a half-hearted wavy, not real curl kind of thing.
For years, I have just straightened my hair (or kept it shorter). It never really did much else…yet all of a sudden my hair has more spunk (or waves) if I let it.

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Sometimes I do, I let it be wild and wavy…some pieces are straight, some curl sweetly and some just frizz or stick out. My inner perfectionist screams that my curls are wild and out of control…yet I let them be and do what they want to be and do.
As I have wrestled with this different type of hair (and let me assure you, the struggle is real…short hair may be in my future), I picture all of us in life. We are wild and wavy. We are unique. Some of us frizz, some curl cutely, some stick out straight, but we each matter, and we each have meaning.
We are wild and wavy. We are unique. Some of us frizz, some curl cutely but we each matter. Click To Tweet
Yet so often we don’t let ourselves just be wild and wavy. We are told to straighten out. Don’t be unique; be like all the other straightened out people…boring, the same, and perfectly smooth.
The thing is…even when I straighten my hair…if it rains or I sweat, the wave returns. There is no perfect conformity and there is no such thing as perfection. It’s an illusion…an unattainable standard. All the striving for perfection brings me is the feeling that I am constantly not enough. I need to do more or try harder.
Yet I am who God created me to be and so are you… wonderfully wild and wavy. I make mistakes and I mess up. Sometimes my waves are pretty and sometimes they are a frizzy mess.
Grace is wild and wavy. It uproots perfection and shouts “It Is Finished”. I’ll settle for wild and wavy because it means I get Jesus…His perfection is better than my horrible attempt to straighten my wild and wavy hair…..
Grace is wild and wavy. It uproots perfection and shouts “It Is Finished”. Click To Tweet

wildlove

Permanent link to this article: http://counseling4hope.com/embracing-who-we-are/

Dec 02

The Not Perfect Christmas

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I love Christmas.  I love the cooler weather, the warm clothes, warm coffee, and snuggling under blankets with family.  I love buying gifts, wrapping gifts, giving gifts, attending Christmas Eve service, being with family, and watching Christmas movies.  Yet, let’s be honest ladies…Christmas for moms (or women in general) can be STRESSFUL.  As if we don’t already have enough to do, let’s pile on a whole bunch of shopping, baking, cooking, decorating, dinner parties, and traveling.   Ummmm…. if I added any of that to a regular week then I am overwhelmed but add it all in one month??  Come on now…where did my sanity go?
Now, I looove LOOKING at beautiful decorations but honestly, I don’t want to spend that much on decor.  I am not even quite sure what to buy when I do have decorating money.  So, we continue to use the same decorations year after year.  My boys don’t seem to mind and I think it looks decent when I am done.  But,  I always feel that my decorations are a little, let’s say, less than magazine perfect.  I never quite feel like my house has “grown up” decorations (and I’m almost 40).  It used to be (back before Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, etc.) that I would only feel bad when I went to someone else’s home that was beautifully decorated.  Now, however, I can feel inadequate just by checking my social media feed.  Not only that, there is so much more to feel bad about…my deficient baking skills, I’m not done with my shopping yet, I didn’t get the best deals during Black Friday, my presents won’t have ribbons or bows, my Christmas cards aren’t done, I have no regular daily Christmas activity planned for the kids, and no elf comes to visit in cleverly cute ways.
It is honestly comical how we put so much pressure on ourselves during this time of year.  I mean what is the point?  Who are we pleasing?  What are we celebrating???  Comparison is evil!  Perfection is unrealistic and unattainable.  Life happens in the mess.  Mistakes forge memories that bond us together in our humanity.  When we share only our achievements and not our mistakes, we don’t connect.  We miss each other.  We feel alone.  
Not only that, if we were perfect…we wouldn’t need Jesus.  Isn’t that the whole point of this time of year anyway?  Because of our imperfection and brokenness, Jesus was born to be the perfection we constantly strive for.  In Jesus, I am completely perfect!  So I am free to embrace my human imperfections (of which there are so many…ask my kids and husband).  So this Christmas, I am going to enjoy each moment, the great ones and the bad ones.  The great ones are a glimpse of eternity when all is made new and the bad ones are a reminder of my need for Jesus!
So celebrate the season and do what you want to do.  No comparing!  Your version of Christmas for your family is just right!
Let’s share our imperfections together this Christmas and have a Not Perfect Christmas.  Let’s really connect and be real on social media.  Let’s proclaim our imperfections loud so Jesus’ perfection is magnified!
Find me @counseling4hope #notperfect!
Here’s my first imperfect social media post:
We made an awesome Christmas budget spreadsheet that we password protected because my kids use this computer.  Ummm…yep, we forgot the password.  #notperfect #Christmas
 If you like what you read, please comment below or share on social media. ❤️

Permanent link to this article: http://counseling4hope.com/not-perfect-christmas/

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